I had the best idea while watching the Kentucky Derby yesterday: I'll create a Bucket List for guys! I have one for myself and one for my dog, why not one for the fellas? They're simple creatures: they all have the same wish list anyway (yes, that's what you call a "generalization"). I'll jot it down for them in a nice list format with pictures and let them skip the paperwork. Dudes need a little extra help after all.
Oh go on, don't gush. It's my pleasure. I'm here to serve.
1. Attendance at major championship sporting events (e.g. World Series, Super Bowl, World Cup, Kentucky Derby, The Masters). I think we can all agree this tops the list for most guys.
2. Threesome. No explanation needed, right?
3. Front row seats and backstage time with favorite rock band/star (usually involves U2, The Rolling Stones, Pearl Jam, Van Halen or Springsteen). For more industrious types, perhaps even PLAYING with said band could be on the list. But that's a pretty tall order.
4. Have an epic birthday party on a yacht. Must also include babes in bikinis all over the place and some douche DJing.
5. Meet/play a sport with favorite sports idol. This one could take various forms. It could be something as simple as finally getting something signed by said idol, or as momentous as having quality time with the person, e.g. golfing, boating, drinking. Who knows. I just know that it's most likely a sports figure and the adoration started during childhood.
6. Trip to Amsterdam. Red Light District. Peep shows. Drugs. A tri-fecta.
7. Pick up a hot date in a luxury sports car. Some might call this the cornerstone of a mid-life crisis. Perhaps not. This is a fantasy of all men. Don't try to deny it.
8. Date a 20 year old once you are an old geezer. This one is actually not that hard, much to most women's dismay.
9. Hangover-style bachelor party in Vegas. Other hot destinations: Miami, New Orleans, Amsterdam, anywhere in Mexico. You could check two items off this list depending on your choice.
10. Run with the bulls in Pamplona. Without getting gored, of course. That would certainly put an asterisk on the experience.
11. Hummers in public places. Movies, airplanes, business meetings. Pretty much anywhere really.
Am I missing anything?