Guest Blog: 10 things that drive single people crazy

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Bossy is the New Black is happy to welcome a guest blogger!  Mary Rivers (@marymaryatl), a digital strategist and fellow amateur "social anthropologist," is joining us to piggy back on my "Single is the new double" post with a list of her own about the not-so-cheery side of singledom: 10 things that drive single people crazy

Being single is a fact of life for many, and while some people manage to go through life with a constant significant other on their arm, others are left to contemplate being perpetually unattached.  Below are observations from the single perspective on why it can sometimes, to be blunt, suck.

1. Halloween in the Office Environment

We've all seen the company-wide email blast that says parents taking their children trick-or-treating are allowed to leave early.  Hmm...so people without children don't have a life and want to work more hours?  Let's see how a policy dictating only people who haven't procreated get free pizza plays out.

 

2. Wedding Invites

It can get to the point where your friends just accept that you are perpetually single and stop even asking if you would like a +1.  Emily Post says we need to be living with someone or engaged to get a +1.  Gee, thanks Em!  Again, we feel penalized for being single, especially when it's an invitation to a wedding where the happy couple knows we will barely know anyone.

 

3. Fix-ups

We appreciate the occasional date fix-ups when it comes from an honest, warm-hearted person who actually knows both parties well.  However, if you just met us, what makes you think you are qualified to be our matchmaker?  Do you know I'm a liberal vegan who is allergic to cats?  Most likely you don't.  We know you're happy being in a couple,  but stop trying so hard to find us a partner just because you dream in hearts.

 

4. Presents

It's not a secret that singles spend more on gifts, events and activities without the benefit of a double-income household.  Weddings, bridal showers, bachelorette/bachelor weekends, baby showers, children's birthday parties -- these are all expenses that add up -- not to mention events that we may never experience for ourselves.  So spend a little extra on a single person's birthday; it's the one day that is just for them.

 

5. The Singles Table

Ever get invited to a party with assigned seating and get placed with other displaced singles (married out-of-town guests that came alone, widows, teenage cousins)?  Just because we can converse easily with a hooker in church doesn't mean we should to be placed with strangers. (Your 18-year old cousin was super hot by the way.)

 

6. Girls /Guys Weekend or Night Out (GNO)

To us this is our daily life; every day is a GNO.  So make note this is a special occasion for YOU, not US.  We happen to enjoy being around members of the opposite sex when we go out, so banning them is weird.  We succumb to these events because otherwise we'll never get to see you alone. Congrats on your hall pass.

 

7. Where is my Invite?

If we have spent the majority of our lifetime single you'd think we'd be secure enough to be #5 on your reservation which includes two couples. We get that couples like to hang/dine with other couples, but once in a while throw your single friend a bone and invite them.  They just might say yes and have a fabulous dating nightmare story to tell.

 

8. Coupons

43% of all Americans over the age of 18 are single, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.  Restaurant chains need to notice that the same 43% don't need a second entree for free if we buy the first at regular price.  Singles only need one entree and the chance of us having the coupon around when a friend is in tow is slim.  10% off will work just fine!  The same goes for Airline companion tickets; can't we just get a discount on a single ticket?

 

9. Food Packaging is Biased

What if we can only eat two carrots, a half a loaf of bread, or a half bag of salad before it all goes bad?  Singles waste a lot of food because the portions we are forced to purchase are too large in quantity.  Even the grocery stores are biased!

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10. Three Can Be a Crowd 

Ever make plans with a friend and they either ask if their significant other can come too or they just bring them without telling you?  Usually we as singles are too nice to say no.  Remember that sometimes we want to vent and have some quality time with our friend without an audience. You'll be OK for one evening without your partner; we know from experience!