Is it just me or is it impossible to watch The Bachelor now without constantly thinking about what we learned on UnREAL? If you watched it you know what I mean. If you didn't, GET ON IT.
UnREAL is a scripted series on Lifetime ("Television for Women") about a fictitious reality dating show called "Everlasting" and gives the behind-the-scenes scoop of what goes into making what we see on TV (watch it here). There are producers manipulating contestants; producers manipulating the lead; producers pushing faux story lines; producers getting involved in who's zooming who. It's very interesting.
All I can think about is how Olivia's producer (and therefore the editing team) are working this "Olivia is the demon" angle 100%. Right? We've seen this before. Boy likes girl. Girl likes boy. Producers push boy to lay it on thick with girl. Boy gives girl lots of roses. Other girls hate girl. Girl gives smug interviews. Audience hates girl too.
That's my guess. But who knows, maybe she really is a wacko.
Anyway, this week's episode had the typical two group dates and a one-on-one date. I'm going to take them out of order and talk about the one-on-one date since the group dates were so stupid.
One-on-one date w/ Caila
First of all, Caila is adorable. She's sweet and honest and seems like a great fit for Ben. Something will definitely go wrong.
Anyway, Charrison picks the date idea for the unsuspecting couple and surprise -- they get to have a ride along with none other than Kevin Hart and Ice Cube. DAMN!!! I want to go! I love those guys. So jealous.
So they get in an old convertible of some sort with Kevin and Cube in the back seat cracking wise throughout the date. Love it.
They take them around L.A. to see how Caila will react to a low brow date, which she seems to take in stride. They pick up some booze at a shady liquor store; they haggle for flowers from a street vendor; they stop at a hot tub store to check out the merchandise. They have the obligatory hot tub time and champagne toast --- but with a little naked Kevin Hart farting on the other side of the tub. Hehe!!
This is actually when I really like this show. They aren't hiding that this is foolish and they are making the date part of this bigger gag. It's almost like the couple gets to see themselves as part of this silliness that is The Bachelor and get through it together. It's way more real than the dates, say, where they are having dinner in a castle telling their deepest darkest secrets then making out in front of a band with fireworks going off over their heads. Yawn.
Next up, they get dressed up and head to dinner. They have a nice time there, but alas, they still have to dance in front of a singer (the lovely Amos Lee) and make out and we are fully back in Bachelor-verse.
I don't want to talk about the specifics of the group dates because they were both stupid. There was the high school date and the love doctor date. That's all I'll say about that. The action is always at the cocktail parties after the date anyway right? Here are my observations from both dates:
- Not sure how I felt about Ben's time with Becca. Was it just me or did it seem a little forced and awkward? I hope I was imagining it because I do like them together. Plus she shoots some good hoops.
- Mandi is a strange bird, but you already knew that. Did you feel bad for Ben when she won the alone time with him? I did.
- When did Amber get so whiny? Has she always been this way? Stop touching your hair!
- I'm not sure I understand why some girls just go ask Ben to talk to him and some don't. Some of the girls sit on the couch like they're glued to it complaining that they don't get any time with him. Me thinks this might be where the producers get involved.
- Lace needs way too much attention. And she's sooooooooooo dramatic. Poor Ben. And he's so patient with her too. I'd give anything if he'd look straight at the camera and say: "Hey Charrison, get this girl out of here. Stat." I'd die laughing.
- Jubilee is gonna crack Lace's skull.
- I'm still recovering from whatever those outfits were that the girls were forced to wear in the second group date. They were like a cross between '70s Farrah Fawcett shorty shorts and a creepy scene from A Clockwork Orange. Yikes. And for those who don't watch, he was SMELLING the girls' pheromones. I shit you not.
- Olivia makes Ben's heart (etc) go pitter patter.
- But --- don't count out Jojo, Jennifer and Lauren B. All got some great alone time with Ben and he told them each how much he was pickin' up what they were puttin' down.
- The girls who get roses on the group dates: Jojo and Olivia.
The sweet and shy LB decides she's had enough of this shit and says au revoir to Ben voluntarily. We also say goodbye to Jackie, Samantha and Mandi.
My front runners after tonight are Caila, Jojo, Olivia, Jennifer and Lauren B. Olivia is definitely in the lead...for now. I like her spunk...but it remains to be seen if the picture ABC is painting of her is "real" or to make her the villain of the season. I'll put Becca on the list for now too, but my gut is telling me this isn't going anywhere.
See ya next week!